Sunday, December 27, 2015

#repost: your problems are not mine

In the name of Allah

Alhamdulillah, last night we had sister’s circle again. K tak, usrah.haha,sama kot maksudnya (: anyway, here I just want to share some thing that I found very very interesting (though most of you guys already knew about this) but I still want to share (:

We have our own problems

Yeah, enough said right? I mean, all of us has our own problems. It just that, sometimes we tends to say things like;

 “Your problem is like very easy compared to mine!You should be thankful lady!”

 “Why is she whining about simple stuff? Come on,there are other more important stuffs to think of like the issues in Egypt and Palestine”

“Chill la bro, masalah kecik je kot. Kau nak gelabah apasal?”

Okay, I’ll be lying if I said I have never encounter those kind of thoughts. Well I think it is quite safe to say, most of us at least once have this kind of impression when people tell they have a problem.

The thing is most of us didn’t realized that each of us has own potentials, strengths and weaknesses. Hence Allah has given each of us things based on our capability. As stated in the Al Quran;

“Allah does not charge a soul except[ with that within ] its capacity………..”                           2:286

Hence, we should not simply judge other people’s feeelings towards a problem ‘cause we will never knew how she/he felt until we are in their position. Yes, we try to understand them so that we can give them comfort and some kind of assurance, that’s good. I mean, that is a very good intention. Though, to say that we completely understood their position is too much I think unless you have experienced it before.

On the other hand, what I want to stress here is that we should not compare our problems. I mean, I can have a problem with my studies which might not be a problem to my friends, and they might have a problem with their relationship which I don’t have any. For this situation, I cannot say my problem is worse than theirs ‘cause what I had in my plate is different than theirs.

One wise thing that you should do when you have people telling you ‘simple’ stuffs is to listen to them ‘cause it can be the other way round, what you think is a minority might be a major thing for them. Obviously when you had your own problem, you want people to listen to you as well right? Er no? Then, this doesn’t apply to you la. Hehe.

Face your own problems with your own weapons

Some people have their own ways in handling things. You cannot simply follow their ways ‘cause it might not suit you. For example, you want to get straight As in your exams and you saw your senior staying up all night and succeed in getting straight As. Then you think that staying up all night is the best way to get straight As and you start to work on that. Well, not everybody can work late night. I mean, your body might not be able to handle staying up late or even your brain. You might get tired the next morning and then screw up your daily activities. So how? Best way is to find your own solutions. Yes, of course you can try their solutions as well, but don’t depend too much on it.

Other than that, people have their own preferences. Some people like to be approached in a ‘soft’ way and some people prefer ‘direct-harsh’ way. So yeah, we have our own preferences. Knowing that, you should respect other people’s preferences as well. Technically, realising that we all have own favourites, we should also come to a sense that we have our own way as well.

I say, push yourself to the limit. Like the song by Corbin Bleu, Push it to the Limit. Hihihi. Like stated above, Allah will not give you something you can’t handle. So if you’re facing a problem, keep remembering that you have a weapon to handle the problem. Sometimes, you might not see it but you can actually handle it. Think positive, and keep calm. Maybe you need to push yourself a bit further than your usual achievement but eventually what happens to you,you would be able to handle and face them.

Too lazy to check since it is too long. Hopefully there are only minor errors. Hihiihi.
Goodnight, sleep well.

p/s: trust is a very important component in a successful relationship
without trust it may lead to obsessive jealousy
lol.bajet terror psl relationship pulak dah
hahahaha

p/s:p/s: congrats if you managed to read all these,you're so patient to finish them
even i can't read it again
mihihihihihihi

*********************************************************************************


This was written on the 22nd of October 2013. Re-reading this makes me thought of how positive and calm I used to be. I can't remember the background to this draft though. Eh no, I got it, I think I remember now. It was when a friend of mine didn't like being labelled as 'hotstuff'.

We used to tease her that since she easily can get along well with the guys and that she knew a lot of people, probably a better,decent word to call her would be people-person. However, thanks to our ignorance and insensitivity, we called her that and at one point, she snapped. She said she hated the term because it means something bad. Another friend was defending herself saying she didn't mean it that way but I kept quiet and hence came this post. Haha. But anyway, I do regret my behaviour to my friend. She was not supposed to be teased like that, I should have known better.

But don't worry, we're all still friends after that. Nonetheless, this is why I thought everyone is having their own struggle. Some might struggle to lose weight, some might struggled to improve their grades and some might struggle to stay away from being accused of falling in love. #eh?

Okay, I think my comment for this post is getting a little bit too lengthy, so until then guise. ADIOS!

Monday, December 21, 2015

'Depressing' books



So, this is how it goes. I’ve been doing pretty much nothing during my summer holiday so I thought, ‘Why not I spend some time reading up a few books? For sure it will not be worthless.’

So, I read and read, most of the time I read the books halfway and I continue with new ones, so that’s why if you go to my reading lists- currently reading, there’s like 4 or 5 books under that label. Why? Because I kind of like jumping to another books at one time. Well, not because they are boring but because I need to make sure I read different kind of books, get what I mean right? *good*

Anyway, as I mentioned up there, I want to talk a little bit about ‘depressing books’ since I’ve read two books that are quite gloomy to me. Those two books are Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami and All The Bright Places by Jeniffer Niven. Why I said these two books were depressing? Because there were characters in the book that committed suicide.

All the bright places
I read this book because a friend of mine recommended it to me. She said I am going to like this book. Well, that’s kind of true though, since I managed to finish the book in a week, or maybe less. But anyhow, when I finished reading the book, I was a little bit sad with the ending. It was pretty sad and I somehow can imagine how helpless Violet is when she found out about Finch (but his first name is Theodore, I don’t know why they didn’t call him that).

The thing is, this guy Finch, he has great level of patience and a nice guy. I mean, he does have anger problem sometimes but he sure is in love with Violet and willing to do anything for her. Violet, on the other hand is one perfect girl who’s on the verge of breaking down but could not seek any help because people expected her to be fine and then come Finch to her rescue.

“‘Growth itself contains the germ of happiness.’ Pearl S. Buck. Maybe a germ is enough. Maybe it’s all you need”[1]


Well, go and get your hands on this book because it was a story worth reading. Don’t expect me to tell you the short version of the story here. *go read by yourself! ;p*

Norwegian Wood
This book is more depressing than the previous one. Let see, there 4 main characters that committed suicide in this book. That is depressing isn’t it? Anyway, the theme for this book is love and mental illness I guess. Though, I have to be honest, there are some details about boy-girl and girl-girl relationship that are too much for me that I have to skip the pages because I don’t want to know about it. But since I’ve started reading already, so I finished the book anyway.

“Memory is a funny thing. When I was in the scene I hardly paid it any attention. I never stopped to think of it as something that would make a lasting impression, certainly never imagined that 18 years later I would recall it in such detail.”[2]

It was so depressing but still, I didn’t regret reading them. Somehow these books gave me a realistic example of those people who are depressed and having mental illness. Surely, most of the time when somebody mentioned, you’ll thought of someone who can’t take care of themselves, don’t bathe and all those common stereotyping. But after reading these two books, I realised better that there are people who lived life normally like us but are having a very hard time coping with life itself.

What I am trying to say is; depression surely is a dangerous illness. Somebody might be too sad and grief after a loss or after anything fatal that happened to her/him. Somebody might get too upset when he’s heartbroken. Somebody might get too emotional and hurt when her sister died all of the sudden. So many, yes so many things can be a factor of having a mental illness.

Why I am writing about this?


Because I wanted you people, who read up my blog to make sure to look on those people around you. Talk to them if something happened. Eh no, before something even happened, get used to them talking. Get to know what’s bothering them and what’s on their mind. Be there for them, don’t just say it and didn’t do it. REALLY BE THERE for them. Don’t assume that they are doing fine because they usually will. Be concern and be a good company.

Nevertheless, what’s more important is that YOU YOURSELF. Whenever you are feeling a little bit down, don’t be shy to ask for help. Don’t be shy to cry to you mum or dad or a good friend. Maybe you need some time and space, but never too much. You have to let it out eventually. Seek peace from God, pray to Him even though you’ve never prayed before. Speak to Him and depends totally on him for peaceful mind and heart.

Careful not to ever let yourself dwell over your sadness and calamity. You might not know it that you are already on the depression region. Anyhow, just remember to be nice to everybody because you never know what’s on their plate right? Even if you do, you won’t understand.

“You know what I like about you? You’re interesting. You’re different. And I can talk to you. Don’t let that go to your head.”[3]

That’s all for the depressing thoughts. Stepping away from it.
Anyway, I’m planning to upload a new video in the next post, wait for it?

BYE!

[1] All the bright places, Jeniffer Niven
[2] Norwegian Wood, Haruki Murakami
[3] All the bright places, Jeniffer Niven

Monday, December 14, 2015

#repost: Bersyukur bukan sekadar di bibir

In the name of Allah the Most Merciful and The Most Beneficial

Alhamdulillah
Alhamdulillah
Alhamdulillah

Baru sahaja dapat tahu keputusan Advanced Subsidiary (AS) Level hari selasa lepas.

Dugaan kali ini terasa pahitnya sebab tak pernah rasa; ya saya akui tak pernah rasa macam ini sebab selama ini selalu dapat apa yang diimpikan.

Target untuk peperiksaan AS adalah untuk dapatkan 5A, ya saya ambil 5A untuk AS level. Ramai juga kawan-kawan tegur supaya saya kurangkan kepada 4, tapi saya tetap dengan keputusan saya sebab saya seronok dengan subjek kelima saya. Sampai saat ini, syukur tak pernah terdetik lagi penyesalan sebab tak kurangkan bilangan mata pelajaran. InsyaAllah ilmu yang saya perolehi akan dimanfaatkan sebaiknya.

Cukupkah sekadar ucapan 'Alhamdulillah'?

Maksud kalimah ini simple je

Alhamdulillah = Segala Puji bagi Allah
tapi untuk menyebutnya dengan penuh rasa rendah diri pasti terasa susahnya saat dirimu diberi sesuatu yang kau tak mahu.

Bersyukur itu bukan sekadar dengan menyebut 'Alhamdulillah' mahupun 'Saya bersyukur'. Bersyukur itu lebih daripada itu, yang saya sendiri kurang pasti bagaimana mahu menggambarkannya. Syukur itu perlu datang bersama mulut, hati juga perbuatan. Memang, kita kecewa kita sedih bila tidak dapat sesuatu yang kita mahukan; tapi itu bukan sebab untuk kita menangis keterlaluan. Jujur saya katakan, saya tiada masalah dengan orang yang menangis saat dia gagal asalkan dia tidak hanyut dengan kesedihan itu. Menangis itu satu perkara biasa terutama kaum wanita. Jadi, usah sedih mahupun kecewa sekiranya anda menangis di saat anda menerima satu kegagalan. Mungkin satu tindak balas refleks membuatkan air mata mengalir kesedihan.

Apa-apa pun yang mahu saya tekankan di sini, saat kita menerima sesuatu kegagalan, mulut wajar berkata 'Alhamdulillah' namun hati turut perlu berkata syukur.

Ingat, kita mungkin boleh gagal lebih jauh, siapa tahu?

Lagipun, tak semua yang kita rancang itu yang terbaik, sesungguhnya Allah adalah perancang terbaik.

"And the disbelievers planned, but Allah planned. And Allah is the best of planners" Al Imran : 54

Maka, siapa kita untuk berkata "Ah apa ini, aku mahu keputusan yang lain!" sesungguhnya kita ini mempunyai ilmu yang sangat sedikit. clueless tentang masa depan dan yang mana baik dan buruk untuk kita.

Adakah bersyukur bermakna tidak berbuat apa-apa?

Memang, kita patut bersyukur sebab firman Allah dalam surah Ibrahim : ayat 7

And [remember] when your Lord proclaimed, 'If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor]; but if you deny,indeed, My punishment is severe'

Ingatlah, syukur itu perlu.
Maka bolehlah bersenang lenang terima je seadanya? Macam tu?

Well, up to you. Kalau rasa hidup mahukan improvement; mahukan kejayaan, maka teruskan berusaha. Terima kegagalan ini sebagai satu titik dalam hidup kita untuk mencipta kejayaan yang lebih besar. Jangan jadikan gagal ini satu alasan. Saya rasa tak perlu lah bagi contoh Thomas Edison ke apa, sebab mesti ramai dah tahu. Cuma, cuba fikir, Allah bagi kita kegagalan ini untuk apa? Pasti bukan untuk buat kita terus menerus gagal. InsyaAllah, tabahkan hati, kuatkan semangat dan terus lihat ke hadapan.

Have faith in Allah.

Dia sayang kita, kalau rasa macam tak cukup kasih sayang, mungkin tiba masanya untuk kita sendiri pergi cari kasih sayang dari Dia?

Make the best in whatever you do; If ever you fail, keep on doing - not the same way, the better way. If you ever succeed, keep on doing - not same success;other success.

Wallahu'alam

p/s: Mood menulis kali ini sangat formal,bila baca balik rasa takutt, gigit bibir. hihi.
Mungkin memujuk hati boleh memujuk hati orang lain juga?
Lalalala, lagu Save Your Heart - Mayday Parade masih lagi best. 
;p

*********************************************************************************



This was written on 15th August 2013, the day I've gotten my AS result. I can't remember how much I got, prolly 2A3B, for sure I didn't get straight As. Well, that was my first time feeling like a total failure, when I'm starting to regret taking A-Levels *honestly I can't believed that I managed to post this thing, so much positivity haha*. And I remembered how I started to have doubts; I got an A for Biology but a B for Physics, when my plan was to take up engineering but here I am, doing Electrical Engineering- now entering my third year. 

Amazing how Allah planned things for me ey? (:

Sunday, December 13, 2015

#repost : Kerugian yang jelas



Rugi rugi
Saat kau punya banyak waktu
Kau habiskan dengan omongan kosong

Rugi rugi
Saat kau miliki ilmu dari serata dunia
Kau habiskan dengan sikap bangga sendiri

Rugi rugi
Saat kau punya sahabat yang baik
Kau sibuk mencari yang lain

Rugi rugi
Saat cinta Ilahi terbentang di depan mata
Kau berlari mengejar cinta manusia

Rugi rugi
Saat seseorang melebihi kau
Kau mengutuk mengata

Rugi rugi
Saat kau berjaya
Kau mula angkuh malah lebih teruk kau mula tamak

Rugi rugi
Saat ini
Kau masih lagi di sini
Membaca ekspresi seorang gadis
Cuba tanyakan kepada diri sendiri
Adakah sudah kau mengerjakan solat?
Jika sudah, Alhamdulillah
Jika belum, maka segerakanlah

p/s: sorry.i could have handled you better

*********************************************************************************

This was written on 11th April 2013; not yet arrived in Sydney.

Reposting old blog posts.

Hi there, so for the next few days*maybe weeks*, I am going to repost my previous blog post that has been hidden (read: saved as draft) which I found somewhat interesting or funny. Note that my current blog is my third blog, on blogspot. and I think I had one on wordpress which I already deleted.

Anyway, I'll make sure to pop up some new fresh ideas as well. *hopefully I'll get some fresh inspiration as well.*

But anyway, for more post like this one, just click on the label: #repost I'm sure a lot will came up.

Till then, bye!

Thursday, December 10, 2015

A walk to Glebe Library


It was Thursday afternoon when she went to the university to meet someone just to find out that somebody is not there. It’s fine, she’ll come again tomorrow. She then proceeded to the computer lab to send an email to the office, telling them she wanted to meet them and planning to set an appointment. She surfed the net, from looking for casual works till online shopping when she suddenly get excited and opened up a new tab. 

She typed ‘Sydney Council Library’ and a list of websites came out. She clicked on the first link and started looking for something, clicking here and there and then she found it. ‘Membership for council library’. Well, she got two options, applying online or visiting any of the libraries. She contemplated for some time then she closed all the browser and log off and walked out from the lab.

She walked towards Broadway along the City Road, well she wanted to buy some groceries but then she didn’t stop at Broadway yet she keep on walking towards Glebe. She recalled seeing the Glebe Library somewhere near the Glebe Market that she went last Saturday so she decided to walk there.

Only to found out that the library was quite far away especially when the road was going uphill. As the sun is really sunny, she was panting a little bit. ‘Need to exercise after this’, she whispered to herself. She could have just taken a bus there but she needed the walk. She wanted to see things and stop worrying too much. So she plugged in her earphones, playlists on. She basically didn’t pay attention to what song is playing but she just needed the background music.

She walked and walked, glancing at the shops along Glebe Point Road while remarking a few shops that she’s going to come again later. There are a few bookshops that catch her eyes but she refrained herself from entering because she needed to go to the library quickly before it closes, as well as she afraid she might get a little too excited and buy a new book. So she keep on walking and looking for the library and then she stopped because she felt she have walked far enough that the library should be around there and suddenly there’s a voice in her head that told her to go back home. She was fighting this little battle of keep going or giving up for a few seconds, and she continued. She walked up straight for less than 5 minutes and the library was on her left. Luckily she didn’t give up. Or else it’ll be a waste of time and energy walking so far just to give up when the ending is just a little bit more.


She went inside and look around. She went to DVDs and CDs section since she already had a lot of books at home needed to be read, so she really don’t want to pile up some more. After having a few CDs to borrow on mind, she went to the counter to sign up for membership. Then, the lovely lady brought her to a computer and ask her to sign up online. She smiled to herself thinking of how she could have done it earlier in the lab. But she filled up the form quickly and settled with the registration. She went to pick up the CDs she wanted to borrow and get out from that place. She’ll definitely come back, well she borrowed the CDs, obviously she have to return them back.

Anyway, after too much walking and her feet starting to ache, she decided for a bus ride home. She already took off her earphones when entering the library and didn’t plan on plugging them on again. She watched people around her and observed the beauty of each individuals. She saw the tall tree that she saw on her way to the library, it was so tall yet so close to the house. So it needed some extra support to make sure it does not fall on the house, or so she guessed.

Nonetheless, she was glad she decided to walk to the library, happy that she got the new membership now that she can go to any council library and borrow some stuffs. She smiled and happily walk home after finishing her groceries shopping. Glad she didn’t give up, surely it does a big impact on herself as she really needed a lot of good support these days. She’s totally on the verge of giving up but she has to keep going. As her friend was saying,


‘Don’t let the rough journey obscures your sight from your true destination.’


She keep on smiling and thanked for a good day.

Tuesday, December 8, 2015

Book Reflection: To kill a mockingbird, Harper Lee


Hi there! Just as I mentioned few days *or maybe weeks* ago in my twitter, I wanted to do some book reviews or book reflections or whatever you want to call it. Somehow book reflections sounds more interesting because I don’t really know a proper book review format. HAHA.

So, the lucky book for my reflection today is To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee.

The reason why I bought this book is because it was suggested by google when I ran a searched on the list of books you have to read before you die. And somehow when I looked for it at the bookstore, the synopsis was quite simple and interesting to me *and the price was quite reasonable hihi*

“Life’s too short for unnecessary stress, so chill. Everything you do, make sure there’s fun in it.”

That’s the quote I wrote in the first blank page of the book. Where I got it or how I came across that? No idea. If it pops out when I write, I’ll make sure to tell you. So, let’s start now.

A wise gentleman

In this book, there’s a father, a very wise father that has been told from the perspective of a kid that is very smart and brave. I gotta be honest, somehow I was amazed with the wisdom shown by Atticus Finch while handling matters with his kids; Jem and Scout. Very young and close brother and sister. I admired their creativity on how they wanted to force Boo Radley out by doing so many things.

But the gentleman I was supposed to describe is Atticus Finch. I can’t really remember which occasions leads me to call him a wise man but from reading the book, I can sense that. He is a lawyer that fight for the minority. The way he explained to his kids about laws and how to be nice to other people. Oh yes, the incident when Jem Finch was punished by Mrs Dubose for ruining the flowers in her front yard. Atticus did not defend his child yet he told Jem to go apologize and do whatever the punishment Mrs Dubose asked him to. Well, the punishment was Jem need to go read to Mrs Dubose for a whole month every evening. Prolly because the punishment is a win-win situation since Mrs Dubose can actually get distracted with their company and would not think too much about her addiction; morphine. So, indeed, Atticus made a good choice by letting the kids to go read to Mrs Dubose as it helps both parties.

Children’s thinking

Reading this book from the point of view of a kid surely is something so pure. I mean, a na├»ve and clean way of thinking without any hatred or prejudice to analyse certain things. Reading it from Scout’s perspective is quite fascinating as sometimes it gave me a back thought of how I would have perceive the same situation if I was a kid. I like those parts when Jem and Scout talked to each other about matters; deep stuffs if you want to call it.

There’s this one part when they both were talking about how they thought folks are just folks but it is not.

‘That’s what I thought, too,’ he said at last, ‘when I was your age. If there’s just one kind of folks, why can’t they get along with each other? If they’re all alike, why do they go out of their way to despise each other? Scout, I think I’m beginning to understand why Boo Radley’s stayed shut up in the house all this time………………..it’s because he wants to stay inside.[1]

This part made me think of how people in this world truly are. There are so many prejudice and jealousy in this world that innocent people got to be blamed.

Anyway, I really recommend this book for everyone. It is a simple book but it has value in it. It has some humour in it and everything is quite relatable in normal life. Siblings’ fights, laws, courtrooms, thug life and so many things. So really, go get a copy of this book and start reading. I am sure you will not regret this book.

As for me, I am still learning to make it a habit to read books so I am starting with these kind of books first before I carry on with ‘heavier’ book. It has good values that can actually make you think a little bit more about it and not solely considering it as a fiction novel.

Anyway, I hope you like how my blog look now! At least I do. Haha. Till then, bye!

p/s: remember, whatever happens,
seeks for the good reasons


[1] To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee, page 247

Friday, November 20, 2015

I'm back but not really

Start: 2246 20112015


I tried writing something, thoughts or just a thought, I can’t.
I am sorry.
Things are just……….
Things.



End: 2252 20112015

Saturday, November 14, 2015

meeting up new souls


Start 2250 14112015

Hello, hi! Thank you for dropping by at my blog, hihi. I’d really appreciate it, really (:

“Things we lose has its way of coming back to us in the end. It’s not always in the way we expect.”
- Luna Lovegood-

As I am writing this blog post, I just finished watching Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix. My own way to stay awake while studying ‘cause I totally can’t stand utter silence. Haha. And basically the reason why I’m spending a few minutes to write up this post is because:

  • I am too tired of studying, I mean, for today, enough of signal transmissions and semiconductor for a day 
  • A friend asked me if he can read up my blog and somehow he got me here; writing this. Well done mate since you’ve gave me a reason to write haha *and procrastinate xD*! 
  • I need to pour out a few of my thoughts on paper *well this is not a paper but oh well* so that I can free some space to get more input for my exams. *this is not even legit Sab ==’ * 
  • I need to rant 
So, let’s get going.

I always had this hobby; to look back through the photos in my hard disk. To read up conversations with my friends, yes, I kept them. Why? Just to make sure that I remember all the details that matters because I know I always failed to remember a lot of things my friends told me. I’d really don’t want to disappoint them when they asked me about something and I forgot about it. It is surely not a good feeling, really, when somebody forget things you cared and you thought they cared too.

But then again, that’s why right? Why people always got crushed with hopes and expectations and they’ll be very devastated. Because they have their thoughts and they keep it to themselves; and unknowingly hope and wanting that other souls to understand prefectly. Sometimes I wonder, is it real bad to expect things from somebody you know and trust? I mean, it is not like you’ll expect something nonsensical from them, right? No? I don’t know, this expectations thingy, I think I had it rooted deep in my heart that I need to stop expecting and try to do it myself, and be clear.

Anyway, this is not what I want to put in words here, I wanted to talk about allowing someone/something new into your life. I was telling myself I should stop all these being nostalgiac and start looking forward. Moving on, so they called. ‘Move on’- I always had trouble comprehending this phrase. I mean, can you actually move on from memories? From things that already happened? Well, maybe I need to research a bit and write about it later. So, let’s KIV first.

I think maybe, just maybe, if you keep on looking at the back, you’ll get motivated and pumped up since you know you’ve been a lot better and can do a lot more. Or maybe in a situation where you almost give up, you’ll see how great you’ve once been and it’ll make you stop giving up. Different people, different take on this, perhaps?

I was going through my previous blog posts and I see some flaws in it and even some that I can’t relate anymore. Haha, ohwell, somebody is surely growing up. But what I want to share it that somehow I came across this,

Kadang-kadang bila kita terlalu selesa dalam kalangan kita hingga kita lupa. Lupa bahawa ruang untuk orang baru dalam hidup kita boleh membawa seribu pelbagai perkara baharu yang jauh lebih menarik dan awesome dari apa yang kita ada.
-KTM Kajang 2009 18012014-

This was my thought exactly at that moment. I remember this thought came up to mind after having a weekend at a camp and given a chance to meet new friends. A junior called me ‘kakak’ in a pleasant way, haha. Ah well, let’s keep going.

*#np Mungkin nanti – Peterpan*

As I may have sounded a little contradicting with my post before this, about keeping your circle of friends small; this is however something totally different. *Somehow the song is being a little bit distracting* It just that I think it is good to try to push yourself out of your comfort zone and start allowing people to come into your life. You’ll get to listen to more stories and learn a lot more. Never restrict yourselves; as you’ll never be abe to see things broadly if you don’t go and seek for knowledge and stay in your own cave so to speak.

……………………………………………………………..


I think this post is going to a lot directions now, haha, what I mean is, I feel like talking about trust and then go out and challenge yourself and at the same time about seeking knowledge. Honestly, I’m sorry, I think my mind is a little bit unsorted and a bit of a mess. I’ll get my quick escape soon after my exam finish on the 19th and we’ll see if I can come up with better written text about something more interesting.

Thank you for reading up to the very end. Maybe we should go for a coffee and come up with more interesting stuffs to ponder about? Omaigod, I can’t wait to share about a book I am currently reading, very interesting. Hm, maybe I should make a tag on book/film review right? *not a bad idea Sab but I sense you gonna failed to keep up with it hahahahah*

Anyway, should be off to bed now and get up early to library tomorrow. Thanks again for reading! (:

Ended: 2352 14112015

p/s: I managed to cut the whole chicken into pieces again
I mean I’m no longer traumatised in handling
 the meat cleaver

Sunday, November 1, 2015

Sometimes we forget to thank those who were giving

start: 1322 01112015

I always noticed this;

We tend to listen to people who didn’t want to tell us anything and ignore the ones who always telling us stuff AND we tend to tell those who didn’t care and hide from those who cared.

It has been bugging me for quite some time actually. I’ve been thinking how these phenomenon seems to be quite normal and ordinary since everyone seems to be doing it, including me. The only times when I realised this is whether I was being unheard when I told something important to him/her or when I realised I lost my focus during a conversation with somebody.

And I realised most of the time, these were caused by distractions from our phones. I’ve been experiencing it lately. When people actually talked to me but they keep looking at their phones (I have to admit I did that as well sometimes) and were distracted to what I am saying. For a few times, it was not a big deal but sometimes it makes me lose respect to these people, lost my trust to them. I don’t know about other people but I keep on telling myself to work on it, to stay focused on whatever the other person is telling me without getting distracted.



And sometimes, I had this feeling that doing a multitasking job is not very efficient if you are not good at it. For example, you are doing your report/assignment/essay while talking to somebody. I sometime think that people keep forgetting what’s important and what’s not but just juggling between them on the very basis of multitasking.

I can see if you are washing dishes while on the phone, that’s pretty acceptable but to cook while on the phone is another thing, especially when the one talking to you is talking about something important and not just having a small conversation with you.

I am not trying to blame anybody here or saying that people who didn’t listen attentively are bad or whatnot, it is just that this habit is not really what we should practice. It is really bad when somebody is telling you their concerns and problems and you were not giving your full attention to it. It is really frustrating, really when somebody you expect to listen didn’t actually be bothered.

*****Somehow, I think this post is becoming more personal. =…= sorry, I was having some difficulties in writing my thoughts in order that’s why I can sense some unnecessary emotions there.*****

Anyway, things to think about; who am I telling to and should be listening to? Should they be the same person or not? Who did I ignored? Who was worth telling to and not? Who care and who didn’t? Who wanted my attention and deserves them?

These things, should really be properly examined. You might be neglecting people who cared, who are sincerely caring for you and not wanting anything in return. These sincere people who are nice to you because they nice, without any hidden agendas. I hope you can find those gems and would realise who are not. Because sometimes, I think we have been chasing something that’s not our to begin with and were ignorant enough to realise that we are letting go things that are truly ours. It is not wrong to chase our dreams and hopes, but make sure we secure what we owned properly and never ever forget and neglect what/who has always been there for us and with us.

I hope you will treasure what you have, and be thankful.

Live simply, love generously, care deeply, and speak kindly.’

Sometimes we forget to thank those who gave, so be thankful.

End: 1357 01112015

p/s: might be taking up philosophy or
psychology for free electives. hm

Monday, October 19, 2015

Jangan, jangan putus asa

mula 2014 19102015

Bismillahhirrahmannirrahim.

Hi semua. Apa khabar? (: Pelik kan entri kali ini dalam Bahasa Melayu. *kalau berdasarkan entri-entri sebelum inilah* tapi tolonglah bersabar, penulis hanya ingin memastikan penggunaan Bahasa Melayu ini masih boleh dikuasai dengan baik.
Kehkehkeh. Okay, BM formal bunyi kelakar bila baca balik. Hahaha. Apa-apa pun mari kita teruskan dengan agenda entri kali ini! *entri bunyi pelik weh HAHA macam main polis entri tu ha haha*

Jadi, kalau anda boleh baca berdasarkan tajuk saya di atas itu, jelaslah kan saya nak cakap pasal jangan berputus asa kan huhuhu. Sebabnya kalau baca entri sebelum ini kan, nampak sangatlah kan tgh emosional tahap tujuh juta kilowatt. Aku Saya *ye tengah cuba jadi baik sikit ni haha* emosi sikit sebab penat sebenarnya sebab baru habis buat program pastu kena buat kerja sekolah *assignment dalam BM apa? Hahaha GAGAL sab!*

Walau bagaimanapun, tidaklah saya berniat nak merungut mahupun merengek terkinja-kinja kegedikan di sini, saya hanya ingin kongsikan tentang apa yang berlaku kepada saya malam itu *semalam padahalnya haha*. Jadi saya kan tengah stress-stress campur penat lapar blablabla kan, saya terlewat la sikit nak solat Maghrib sebab terkalut buat benda lain. Nak dekat pukul 8 baru solat Maghrib *astagfirullah sister, apa ni* so haha tengah-tengah Isyak nak masuk dah lagi 20 minit camtu, saya pun macam “k sab, apa kata jadi baik sikit, gi baca Quran huhu”

Belek Quran tanpa kisah surah apa, saya pun bacalah. Dalam dua muka surat je sebab tak rajin sangat hoho. Cuma, sempatlah baca terjemahan. Baca punya baca pastu terbaca terjemahan yang ni,

Dan Kami tidak memberati seseorang melainkan apa yang terdaya olehnya; dan di sisi Kami ada sebuah Kitab (suratan amal) yang menyatakan segala-galanya dengan benar, sedang mereka tidak dianiaya. (Al-Mukminun, 23:62)

Ayat ini buat saya tersentak sekejap. Sebab? Sebab saya tengah mengeluh dan tengah rasa tak semangat langsung masa tu. “……..kami tidak memberati seseorang melainkan apa yang terdaya olehnya…” Allah dah janji dah Dia takkan bagi kita apa yang kita tak boleh tanggung. Menariknya bagi saya adalah saya selalu dengar pasal ni; Allah bagi apa-apa kepada kita mengikut kemampuan kita. Tapi selalunya orang kaitkan dengan surah Al-Baqarah ayat 286.

Terpempanlah sekejap sebab dua kali *entah-entah lebih, saya je takde ilmu :(* Allah ingatkan dalam Quran pasal benda ni dan saya ni duk blurr blurr mengeluh sana mengeluh sini. Cuma tak sempat lagi nak baca tafsir ayat ni betul-betul, rasa macam ada cerita menarik ni. Harap-harap diberi kelapangan masa dan peluang nanti. (:

Apa-apa pun, betullah orang kata. Kamu jaga Quran, Quran jaga kamu. Kamu jaga Allah, Allah jaga kamu. Mama pun selalu pesan, “Jangan lupa bangun solat Tahajjud dan solat Dhuha macam mana sibuk pun.”

Dah tiba masanya kot nak kena hargai benda yang ada depan mata betul-betul. Dan dah tiba masanya nak buang benda lagha dan sikap endah tak endah tu dan kena mula cari kefahaman dalam setiap ilmu tu.

Moral cerita ini? Baca Quran kalau tengah stress, jangan lari daripada masalah. Allah tu ada dengan kau, kau je yang buat-buat tak Nampak #notauntukdirisendiri

Salam sayang daripada saya.

Moga kamu sentiasa dalam lindungan Allah (:

tamat: 2041 19102015

Maka yang mana satu di antara nikmat-nikmat Tuhan kamu, yang kamu hendak dustakan?



 p/s: patutlah kena buat laporan dlm BM haritu
 rasa seksa sangat haha

Sunday, October 18, 2015

chaos

start: 1552 18102015

I’m procrastinating right now. I should be doing my assignment that is due tomorrow but somehow I can't stop thinking about a few things. So, I think it is best for me to write out a few things.

The truth is I am scared. Of so many things. I can feel that I am walking not in the right direction anymore, I might have u-turn-ed a little bit somewhere somehow.



And I am feeling a little bit sad. So many things happening that I am feeling sad. I guessed I haven’t overcome a few sad occasions that occurred to me recently. I haven’t had a good cry for myself and I can’t see any time in coming week to do that.

I am tired, tired with all the accusations from people. Or maybe I am thinking too much. I don’t know. I am just, I don’t know. Everything I do, seems so wrong.

Okay, I should stop now.
Bye.

End: 1607 18102015

p/s: I didn’t feel any better
At all

Sunday, October 11, 2015

Of 21-st birthday celebration

start: 0245 111012015




  

Alhamdulillah I was given the opportunity to be 21 (: Alhamdulillah for 21 years of blessed life. I was so blessed to have loving family, great friends and so many more that if I list them down, I won’t have time to talk about other stuffs huhu.

**background plays -- All I Want – Kodaline**

What initiated this blog post was when my friend said this to me,

“Sab, kawan-kawan kau best lah sab! Bertuahnya kau.”

And her words got me startled for a bit.

Last night, we had a simple celebration but I enjoyed till the very last bit of it. It was just a dinner together and an hour of watching fireworks and lepak-ing. But it was enough for me,really. Many people might not know this but I am that kind of people who recognized small little things and appreciate thoughts more than materials. I was not really into fancy stuffs, so having dinner with friends and spending time together for a while was enough for me.

Then again, she reminded me of how I should really be thankful with my friends here in Sydney. Allah planned the best for me since I came to Sydney alone with nobody I knew and He guided me to meet these beautiful souls and made them my friends  (: I have friends who are willing to go find cake for me even though it was a last minute plan, who gather up others to celebrate my birthday though having pile of assignments to do, who still spend time watching fireworks with me even though they are tired from futsal in the morning, who really tried to cheer me up for the whole day, who try to make me feel special and appreciated, who still come all the way from a long journey just to say Happy Birthday to me and not to forget those that are miles away, still remembers me. Really, I am so happy to known these amazing people in my life.

I’d really don’t want to brag but I have great company here haha and pretty much everywhere else haha. I really hope I can be their best buddies that I can be there for them every time they needed company. 

For my birthday, I initially planned for a low-profile-chilling birthday celebration given the circumstances everyone is busy since exam is in a month but I guessed the plan failed. Haha. Had a good night actually.  For more pictures, please check out my Instagram or vsco. Huhu.

“So, what do you feel now that you are 21?”

HAPPY and TRULY BLESSED. I don’t really know what to say. Being 21 allows me to do so many other things. But yeah, I keep on thinking about responsibilities as well. As you aged, you need to have more knowledge, be more responsible, more mature, more sincere, wiser, etc. I really hope my 21 years of blessed life before this were not wasted with too many unnecessary stuffs. Hm. Besides for the fact we already got the certificate for pre-marital course and can proceed to other stuffs like sending application to JPA to get married ahhahaha. Okay, no, not yet. Got plenty of room to improve myself. So, not yet. LOL.

Okay, back to the topic, hihi.

“Having a few friends is enough, as long you know who your friends are.”

Sometimes, I am a little bit jealous with people who know a lot of people, who has a lot of friends but then again I give a thought back and yeah, how many would really spend time for you and be there when you needed company the most? Mama and abah, they don’t really have a lot of friends. When we organised a feast or any ‘kenduri’, I’ll be seeing the same faces, a few same faces. And both my parents they don’t really hang out with friends, they spend time together but only with a few that I recognised for so long as I can remember. Back then, I can’t understand when my mum told me she doesn’t have a lot friends. I mean, she lived for 40 years, how could she don’t have friends. But now I think I got it. Being an acquaintance is not the same as being a friend. So I guess the idea is to keep your circle of friends small. Because these friendships, they should really be taken care of and if you are not naturally a –people-person *like me* then, you should really be careful not to get too excited in getting a long list of friends, without trying to be a good friend.

Your friend is the reflection of who you are. I really like this statement actually since you can look who you are from you friends, from who you spend time with, talk to, hang out with etc. Personally for me, I’ve got plenty of good friends. I can see how kind and sincere my friends are; I hope I can give the same reflection for them. Of how they reflect myself is important but what’s more important is that whether I’ve done a good job in reflecting themselves.

**Sparks - Coldplay**

I remembered watching Nouman Ali Khan’s video last year, he talked about types of friends mentioned in the Quran. There are 10 types of them. He listed down all 10 and briefly described what situation and so forth. You should really go check that out but what caught my mind was that, “Don’t get excited categorising your friends but rather focus on what kind of friend you should be.”

I guess what matters most is yourself. If your inner self is good, inshaAllah you’ll display a good physical appearance as well as good personality. I hope we’ll get to know better of ourselves and know where to improve ourselves. May all of us can be a good friend. (:

Finally, to end this post, lets try our best to be a better friend to our friends? Together? *smiles*

Goodnight.

** High Hopes – Kodaline **

ended: 0356 11102015

p/s: maybe the idea is to be content with you life



Thursday, September 17, 2015

Suffocated



Sometimes, when I am running, I am suffocating.
But I keep on running anyway.
And I just get suffocated.

Friday, September 11, 2015

Third person

Start: 1442 11092015

She was sitting alone in one corner of the common room. She had her ears plugged with ear pods, with maximum volume. James Arthur is singing Recovery to her and she had her head focus to her laptop. She was typing so fast as if she had all the ideas in the world to keep on typing. As if she had something going on inside her mind that needed to be written to the blank space.

The others in the room are basically being very cheerful and happy, playing ‘Truth or Dare’. Yet this one lady in the red-checkered shirt does not give a damn about them. She kept typing and didn’t even looked up when the other girls burst with laughter.


Actually she just got back from lunch with her friend. They had one-hour break in a small nice coffee shop near the campus. She kept on doing her stuffs, totally lost in her own world. Not sure what is so important that she does not care about her surroundings at all.

Her phone suddenly vibrated and she quickly take a look at it, as if she has been waiting for someone’s response. She frowned after gotten the text, looking more like a burden have been added to her. She felt very tensed that now when she typed, she didn’t smile anymore. She looked very sad and she had trouble typing now. She kept typing and deleting whatever she wrote.

She was totally disturbed by whatever news she just read because she stopped typing and let out a soft sigh. Slow enough as if she wanted to hear it just for herself. She started packing up her stuffs. She still had her ear pods on and James Arthur was singing Certain Things now. She smiled to the others in the room, briefly and she left the common room, wearing a happy smile on her face.

end: 1515 11092015

p/s: There’s no proof-read for this post,

Apologize for the mistakes

Sunday, September 6, 2015

No anger, have patience

Start: 0123 06092015

Hellllooooo people!

How’s your weekend so far? Mine is good, Alhamdulillah (: excited for a busy Sunday tomorrow, haha yeahhhh. Anyway, let’s not talk about it, we’ll talk about something else.
So, actually, I was planning to dedicate a post about chocolate cake and churros, but I guessed it is not necessary since people can just google them and found tons of different more delicious recipes. So, here’s a picture of the two of them haha.



My initial intention of writing this post is to write what happened to me for past few days. A diary, if you want to name it. So, here it goes:

Dear diary,
It has been two days since I was left alone at home, yeah, all alone since my other housemates decided to go to Tasmania! I know rigghttt? They went to Tassie in the middle of a busy semester! Agh! Lucky you lucky you phd students. I know I shouldn’t be ranting about my busy schedule, I mean it’s not anyone else’s fault but myself, still I want to rant about it. Hihihi.
It was not that bad though, having the house for myself, *I’ve avoided any movies, or stories that are related to ghost haha or else I’ll be freaking scared to stay at home alone* since I’ve got so many things to do to occupy myself. Haha. Yelah, sebab kalau takdak benda nak buat nanti mesti pishang huhu.
So, Syalin is here in Sydney, with her mum and dad, so yeah, I’ll just spend some time with her tomorrow for lunch. What else? Oh yeah, I have finished reading ‘What I talk about when I talk about running’ by Haruki Murakami. It was a pretty good book, talking about life in general and somehow I kinda like his way of writing. I was thinking of giving this book to somebody, but I don’t know to whom. Haha, maybe anyone interested can tell me here and drop me a comment? Hihi.
Feels like I’m talking nothing intellectual here, not worth a post, haha. So, let’s talk about something beneficial. Okay diary? Okay? Good. (:
Last weekend, despite so many things to do, I just had to go to this one small gathering with a few sisters, we did the gathering at Kahawa in Newton. It was a good restaurant with good food at a good price! Anyway, we had a small discussion about patience and about being yourself. So, someone shared about Hadith 16 of Hadith 40 by Imam Nawawi.

On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him):
“A man said to the Prophet, ‘Give me advice.’ The Prophet, peace be upon him, said, ‘Do not get angry.’ The man asked repeatedly and the Prophet answered each time, ‘Do not get angry.’”
Related by Bukhari & Muslim

        The hadith is basically about how we have to stay patience in all times. How we have to avoid being angry, especially when we are stressed and are under a lot of pressure. This reminder came at the right moment for me as at the moment I was busy doing things that I think I might have hurt some feelings by being angry at them. So, it was a very gentle reminder from Allah, alhamdulillah. We discussed a few tips to avoid being angry- we have to try to stay calm, we should make ablution, we have to clarify and check our facts before we jump into any conclusion, we stay silent, change our position or pray for patience from Allah.
                I still remembered a friend told me, in psychology, there is this theory that anger can be transferred. So, let say A is angry at B, then B would be angry at C in order to transfer the anger. So, the process will continue until it reach a person that can be patient enough to channel the anger to something else, or to ground the anger. And another friend also told me, “being patience is best at the start not at the end”, which means that it is not being patience if you go mad at first and start talking with anger and let it all out, then only you said, “Have patience dear self”.
Hence, I guess we should really try our best to stay calm and patience at all times. Whether we are at fault or not, we should really avoid being angry. ‘cause it will hurt a lot of feelings, and it is so not good to hurt those whom we loved. (: Then another sister talked about Kun Anta- Being yourself. I guessed I’ll save this one for later, inshaAllah. I should really go back to my quiz. Talk to you soon diary?
Love, Sabrina

I need to find new book to read then, let’s go to bookstore anytime soon or maybe just drop by at Fisher Library to borrow some books. Till then peeps, bye!

end: 0248 06092015

p/s: I don’t like cakes
but I like baking
HOHO